"When people hear about my birth story so many of them say "oh you poor thing" or somehow see the situation as a negative experience but I quickly correct them because it was the most empowering experience of my life... I've said multiple times that I wish I could do it all over again."
MAMA: Samantha Merrie @samantha_merrie_90
Sorry for the long story but I feel it's important to discuss the difficulties as well as the positives đ„°
Pregnancy:
I always had this perfect picture of pregnancy so at week 5 when I started experiencing HG I was extremely deflated. I couldn't go more than 30 minutes without vomiting for weeks until I found a medication mix that worked to help reduce the vomiting. I had experienced a miscarriage in the past, so my anxiety was already high for this pregnancy, then add the fear of wondering how much nutrients my baby was getting due to the HG, by week 12 I was anxious and depressed mess. Then the fear of birth set in, I was having nightmares regularly of the birth which was fuelled by my fear of hospitals. I honestly felt like I as failing as a woman and a mother. After a lot of thought I decided to think of things that I could control throughout the pregnancy and within my life at that moment, I am a huge believer that knowledge is power, so I reached out to Justine who is a big advocate for positive birth. She quickly suggested the positive birth company, so I jumped online and bought the pack immediately. Boy, it was truly a God send! After visiting a local pregnancy centre, I expressed my anxiety of my situation but mentioned I was doing a hypnobirthing course which I had already felt had made a difference in my overall feeling about birth. They suggested that I apply for a family birth centre for the birth rather than birthing at the hospital as they seemed to align with the path I wanted to follow for birth. I applied that afternoon however I wasn't hopefully I'd be accepted but a few days later I had a phone call, and a meeting was arranged where I was approved to birth there .
Birth Story:
From about 35 weeks baby was engaged and I was experiencing light cramps, back pain and Braxton Hicks which I was reassured was all positive signs. On Friday 29th I had a visit with my midwife, she was hesitant but completed a stretch and sweep so see how I was going. Much to my surprise I was 2cm already and she was confident that I as going to go into labour the following day which was my due date. She joked that she had leave booked for that night so to hold off until Sunday noon when she would be back on call .
Saturday 30th (my due date) Following the stretch and sweep I had the usual feeling of cramps and light spotting. I decided to have a lazy couch day and didn't even bother getting out my PJ's. I told my husband that the next day I was going to make sure I stayed super active to help bring on labour after having such a lazy day. He suggested I just listen to my body and not push myself too much but I was adamant I was going for a long coast walk with my dog and getting all my house work done. My husband, his mum and I had bets going about when baby would come. My hubby was sure she would be early, his mum was sure she would be a due date baby and I was sure she would be late seeing as the pregancy had been such a challenge, there was no way I'd be so lucky and have a due date bub .
That night I decided to run myself a bath and head to bed to watch my run of favorite shows on TV which was 2 episodes of Ambulance followed by one born every minute , this was my Saturday night ritual from about 30 weeks. At 8pm my mother-in-law messaged me asking if there were any signs, I joked that she better get her $10 ready because she wasn't going to be a due date baby . At about 10pm my back was starting to ache again, I put it down to not sitting properly in bed while watching TV and not moving much that day. I asked my husband to pop my heat back in the microwave and give me some paracetamol. He suggested I turn the tv off and get some sleep in case this was the start of labour, I blew him off because the one born every minute episode looked like a good one in the advert previews.
During one born every minute I jumped on my birth ball and bounced away. The show finished at 11pm and I continued to bounce while leaning over my bed, this was giving me some pain relief on my back. I thought I should play around with my Freya app seeing as I hadn't played with it since downloading it at about 23 weeks .
At 11.20pm I felt my first contraction, I had no doubt it was a contraction because of the surge sensation I felt. I called out to my husband and asked if he could put my tens machine on just in case it was the start of labour, I still wasn't 100% sure that it was all happening because it only lasted 15 seconds. 5 minutes later the next contraction hit which lasted 50 seconds and from then onwards it was game on with the contractions lasting between 30 - 50 seconds and coming every 5 - 7 minutes. By 11.57 they were coming every 3 - 4 minutes however the duration was lasting anywhere between 30 seconds to a minute. I started to feel uncomfortable and felt like the tens machine honestly wasn't doing very much. I had the urge to move around and wanted to be alone.
I asked my hubby to light the candles in our ensuite (which is all black tiled), so I could lie on the cold dark floor with the door closed. I last two contractions in there and wanted to move again . The following 1.5 hour absolutely flew by to my surprise, I went from ensuite, to bedroom to living room trying to find a comfortable spot. This was one thing I didn't really expect, I honestly couldn't find a comfortable position. I was on the bed, floor, couch, ball but nothing was working. I found myself on all 4's in our front room which was the smallest and darkest room of the house. At 1.45 I was telling my husband to call the midwife but (bless him) he said he would when contractions hit 60 seconds long consistently . In his defence the birth centre did say not to call until they had been lasting 60 seconds for about 1.5 - 2hrs and if in the middle night, only call if we are 100% sure it's happening. The Freya App was saying I was in active labour which I kept showing him.
At 2am he finally gave the midwife a call, my midwife was on leave, so we got her back to back - he also messaged his mum at this point because he was feeling a little out of his depth with everything so she came up "to watch the dog" but really to keep him calm . The midwife quickly established that I was in active labour. I remember getting frustrated because she was trying to ask me questions, but I couldn't answer them because I was focusing on my breathing... I remember waving the phone away when my husband was holding it. Because she wasn't my regular midwife, she had no idea we lived 45 minutes away from the birth centre. When she asked my husband how long it would take to get there, she quickly said to me that I had two option, I needed to get into the car ASAP or call an ambulance... an ambulance never ever crossed my mind... I was so determined to have my water birth that I said I would come in the car now.
As my husband lifted me off all fours I quickly knew there was no way I could even get to the car so opted for the ambulance. We had the emergency operator and the midwife on the phone for what felt like a lifetime. As soon as my husband called for the ambulance, I felt the urge to push, because my waters hadn't broken yet the midwife and operator both said the pressure was likely my waters and when they go I'll feel a little less of that pressure. The operator started prepping my hubby for delivery while the midwife helped me breath through my contractions.... My husband had just put down some towels and my waters went, from there it was all go go go. The urge to push was so strong I remember saying "I'm trying not to push" as my body was pushing .
It was the most unbelievable feeling; I just allowed my body to do what it had to do. The paramedics arrived much to my relief, they arrived 6 minutes after my waters broke. We had an intensive care paramedic arrive along with the two medics in the van. They tried to cover my up as I only had a top on but I didn't care who saw what, I just wanted some gas and air asap.
They got me on the stretcher, and I remember looking at the stars and feeling the cold air on me, I actually said I just needed a minute in the cool air. I felt like it refocused me weirdly enough, they told my husband to follow the ambulance in our car and told him that they had to take me to the local hospital rather than the birth center because I was so close to delivery (they said this quietly because I was still telling them I was having a water birth ). As they got me into the van I had the urge to put my hand down between my legs, it was at this point I felt a head! I said to the paramedic that she was coming and I just felt her, he had a look under the sheet and said "no, no, you still have awhile". He then jumped behind me and the female officer was in front of me. I told her that I didn't want to be on my back so I turned on my side. As soon as I settled onto my side she said "heads out and I can see cord". I was in shock; I didn't even feel like I had pushed!!
Then my body pushed down and I felt my babies body literally slip out of me. The feeling was unreal!!!! She told me to turn onto my back and she placed my girl onto me. I was in total shock; I couldn't work out how my baby was in my arms and I never "pushed"
Luckily the male paramedic had jumped out and told my husband to get in when I told him I felt her head . He was just trying to keep me calm so hubby had time to see the birth which thankfully he did from behind me! We had delayed cord clamping and hubby was allowed to cut the cord which we were both so so grateful for! The ambulance officers called the midwife to tell her bub was delivered and we were both doing really well. We were all buzzing and I kept saying " I did it, I did it"
We went to the local hospital as I honestly didn't care any more, she was here and safe and I was so so in love! I had a second degree tear so got to try the gas and air which I loved I was singing along to Justin Timberlake which was on the radio with the midwife while I was being stitched. My husband said it was a weird sight, seeing me singing along while being stitched down there . I was discharged that evening and was home 15hrs after birth, I was hoping quicker but the doctors were busy that day so couldn't check us over until that evening and their was strict Covid restrictions meaning hubby could only come to collect me within visiting hours.
When people hear about my birth story so many of them say "oh you poor thing" or somehow see the situation as a negative experience but I quickly correct them because it was the most empowering experience of my life... I've said multiple times that I wish I could do it all over again. My birthing experience was incredible and I cannot wait to do it again!!! Even through all the HG, I'm so excited to experience it again and that's all thanks to the Positive Birth Company so thank you!!! And for any ladies reading this who are suffering from HG, you are strong and you are incredible!! It is worth all the sickness when your holding that little one hang in there xx
Comments